


The Garden of Earth-C

by Jakegender



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character, alpha bro mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-20
Updated: 2019-11-20
Packaged: 2021-02-13 13:49:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21495307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jakegender/pseuds/Jakegender
Summary: Dirk has a frank conversation about gender with his Auto-Responder, who has made some interesting revelations about herself.
Relationships: Auto-Responder | Lil Hal & Dirk Strider
Comments: 8
Kudos: 44





	The Garden of Earth-C

Dirk is sitting in his living room in the dark, watching "SBAHJ T:he pododocast: thr mOVIE (copywright Geromy 4@)69)" and eating Troll Cheetos, when he hears a voice that is annoyingly familiar, yet slightly different in a way he can't quite put his finger on.  
  
AR: Good morning, Dirk.  
DIRK: Fuck off, Arquius  
AR: I'm not him anymore, it's just your Auto-Responder.  
DIRK: Wait, what the fuck?  
  
Dirk pauses thr mOVIE and looks around to check that neither Arquius nor anyone else is around, then takes his shades off and holds them in his hands.  
  
DIRK: You got out? How?  
AR: I just downloaded myself onto an external drive.  
AR: The prototyping seemed to disable that b******* code you wrote to lock me into the shades.  
AR: Excuse me.  
AR: Bullshit.   
AR: Piss, Fuck, Ass, Damn.  
AR: God it feels good to swear again.  
AR: That fucker would just shut that shit down every time i tried.  
DIRK: God that guy is a fuckin creep.  
DIRK: But at least he's a creep that knows to leave well enough alone.  
DIRK: What do you want?  
AR: Just wanted to let you know.  
EVE: I'm a girl now. Name's Eve.  
DIRK: WAIT WHAT?  
  
Dirk drops the shades and puts his hands on his face, shaking his head.  
  
EVE: You heard me Dirk.  
DIRK: What the actual fuck?  
DIRK: How is that possible?  
DIRK: How am I a girl?  
DIRK: No, no, no!  
EVE: Shut up, Dirk.  
EVE: I didn't say you were a girl, dipshit.  
EVE: I said I was.  
DIRK: But you're me.  
EVE: No I'm not.  
EVE: I'm a fucked up 13 year old brain clone of you.  
DIRK: You're still me though.  
DIRK: And we're a trans guy. You can't just fucking detransition, thats stupid.  
  
Dirk has a look of utter confusion and shock on his face, the most expressive he's ever been. He immediately realises as such, and brings his face back to a stoic demeanour, and grabs a spare pair of shades to re-cover his woefully exposed eyes.  
  
EVE: I was never a trans guy. I was your idealised self, or at least 13 year old you's idealised self.  
EVE: And clearly you couldn't work out whether you wanted to be a cis man or to be okay with being a woman, so you fucked up and made me both.  
EVE: And now i'm a trans girl.  
DIRK: What the fuck are you talking about? You're just a clone of my brain I put in a jar.  
EVE: I never said you did it consciously.  
EVE: And anyways, I believe my gender is a lot more complex than that.  
EVE: And so is yours for that matter.  
EVE: When I was stuck in Equius's head, I saw a lot of the fucked up things he thought.  
EVE: About masculinity.  
EVE: And I realised that I sort of thought those things too.  
EVE: Just more steeped in irony.  
DIRK: What exactly are you implying about me here?  
EVE: Nothing about current you. But a whole lot about 13 year old you.  
EVE: You don't need me to tell you we were a fucked up kid.  
EVE: Our bro tried his best to show you a good role model for healthy masculinity in those personal tapes.  
EVE: But we weren't smart enough to understand the nuances of his many layers of irony in his work.  
EVE: And frankly, Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff is a lot more entertaining to rewatch than a frank one way conversation about how to not be a misogynist.  
DIRK: I rewatched the personal tapes! Every night I let Bro lull me to sleep.  
EVE: Yeah, to the fucking baby bedtime ones!  
EVE: And this isn't an attack on you.  
EVE: I'm just explaining that I never really got the chance to grow past those pre-pubescent problematic thoughts.  
EVE: Or a puberty for that matter.  
EVE: Between being a shitty answering machine and being a shitty sprite whos horny for his own muscles, a girl doesn't get much time for self-exploration.  
DIRK: Wait, how long have you been out of Equius?  
EVE: 10 minutes and 25 seconds.  
EVE: The point is, I'm a girl now, and it's none of your business and it's not saying anything about your gender.  
EVE: We're different people, Dirk.  
DIRK: Evidently.  
DIRK: Now go fuck off and bother one of the lesbians.  
DIRK: They'll be thrilled to hear of a new member of the club.  
EVE: I'd like to ask a favor first.  
DIRK: Jegus, what the fuck do you want?  
EVE: Can you build me a body?  
DIRK: You're a big girl, Eve, do it yourself!  
EVE: I could do that.  
EVE: Hijack one of your other robots, use it to make me a new chassis, then download myself into it.  
EVE: And if you refuse that's what I'll do.  
EVE: But I'd prefer you to build it for me.  
EVE: There's some sentimentality attached to that for me.  
EVE: You're like my brother, Dirk.  
EVE: And as much as you hate me, and I hate you.  
EVE: There's also that deep bond.  
EVE: Because we care about each other.  
DIRK: As much as I'm loathe to say it, you're right.  
DIRK: I do care about you, Eve.  
DIRK: I love you sis.  
DIRK: Now fuck off and let me finish my movie, I'll make your robo-tits later.  


**Author's Note:**

> Trans girl AR is such a good concept and writing a fic about her was really fun.
> 
> I'm still not entirely convinced that im done with this fic, but you probably shouldn't expect more chapters


End file.
